In this fast-paced world, where everyone seems to be running a race to get more, to become more, to accumulate more, to show more, to do more, we kinda start taking life rather too seriously and totally forget about how we can be cool in life.
Being cool in today’s world is a superpower, seriously. So many people simply go nuts when things turn ugly in life, which it will at some point or the other.
You broke up with your partner and feel like it’s the end of the world. Your dream company which meant everything to you, where you gave in your every ounce of blood, sweat, and tears, handed you a pink slip out of the bloom and your life purpose apparently goes down the toilet. Someone close to you passes away, and your life comes to a halt and you seem to have no clue what to do next.
So, I suppose you are also gonna agree with me that our ability to be cool in life has gone down significantly and we are in a dire need to rejuvenate our hidden coolness to glide through in life, gracefully and magnanimously, the way it was supposed to be.
You Are Not Special
And I mean that in a good way. Everybody on the face of the planet goes through some kind of shit or another. Someone’s getting fired, someone’s becoming broke, someone’s business is just about to fail, someone’s relationship is about to be over. And that’s part of life.
You are not some special mystical creature on the planet who has been specifically pinpointed by some superior authority. So, don’t be under the misguided impression that life is not playing fair with you or that God has specifically made your life a living hell. Relax and chill.
You have problems, I have problems, everybody has got some problems. So what!? Be cool about it. The fact that you are not special in this context is what will help you feel relieved and take life lightly. Stop making mountains of a mole, and just move on.
As long as you keep telling stories to yourself as to how screwed up your life is, you are gonna have a bumpy road ahead. Take it easy, inhale all the challenges and hardships, and exhale coolness and calmness.
There Are Multiple Angles of A Situation
A person who is cool in life will always look at a situation from the perspective of making it a sport and keeping it fluffy.
Always keep this in mind, just because you look at a situation from one particular perspective, it doesn’t mean that’s just it, there are a hundred and twelve other perspectives to choose from. So, if you have to choose one, you might as well choose something that actually benefits you. Makes sense, right?
The ability to transform even the gravest and the most serious of situations into a fun scenario is indeed a superpower, and that’s what being cool is all about. (Not talking about being facetious or flippant)
Just because you got fired from your job, doesn’t mean you are a worthless loser, be cool and just look for a new job. Just because your business went belly up doesn’t mean your business acumen sucks and you will never be able to make it big, be cool and just start another one. And just because your partner dumped you doesn’t mean you are unlovable, be cool and find another one.
I mean, simply listing all the negatives of a particular situation and reminding yourself of how shitty of a position you are in, isn’t yielding any results anyway, so why not be cool about it and change your perspective?
You have to be Cool internally
Now, this is where things get a tad tricky. You don’t actually have to portray your cool self to the outside world 24*7. In fact, being cool is something where you are either cool or not. The more you try to be cool, the more uncool you look.
So, the main crux of the issue is that you don’t necessarily have to look cool outside, but instead be cool on the inside.
If there is someone that you are not particularly in awe of but at the same time can’t even get rid of that person, then you just simply have to be cool on the inside. You might not have complete control over what you are gonna do outside, as it’s gonna depend on a ton of factors, but what you do inside yourself is completely in your hands.
You can very well release all the anger, frustration, and temper on someone in your mind, you can ridicule and poke fun at someone who keeps pestering you without ever uttering a single word on his face and still get the fun out of it, but that will cause even more complexities eventually at later point of time. So, instead of doing that, you can shift your spotlight from his shortcomings to his potential positives. Doing it in your mind is a lot easier and straightforward than having to do it face to face.
But then there are also some situations where you can’t keep your cool towards someone who’s doing something wrong ethically, morally, or legally and just do nothing. You gotta take a stand at such situations in the outside world otherwise the world will become a mess if everyone just started acting cool without understanding the true essence of it. The real spirit of being cool in life isn’t to turn a blind eye to something happening that’s against your core values, but it is actually to keep your peace in the inside world even if you have to act on the outside.
Hyper-Active Outside, Cool Inside
I am sure many people are gonna misunderstand the whole context of what’s being said and instead are gonna use this as a shield to justify their laziness in real life. If you are acting uber cool in the outside world you are bound to get lazy and would stop even trying and give up too soon. That’s not cool bro.
The aim is to be hyperactive on the outside and yet maintain an inner sense of cool and calm in life on the inside. But unfortunately, the opposite is what has become prominent in today’s world. People are so calm that they simply refuse to take any actions required and yet their mind is full of ripples and is anything but cool. And that is not cool, at all.
The biggest reason why people lose track is that they are simply not aware of what their current mental state actually is. They let their minds function on autopilot and operate on the same habits that were set way before and never really question why they are doing what they are doing.
The best way to change your track and head in the right direction is by simply being self-aware of where your mind is taking you and subtly giving it the direction that you know is right for you. This is not something that’s gonna magically fall onto your lap from the sky, this is gonna take time and consistency. So, go easy on your expectations.
Don’t expect that you will become cool in life overnight. Becoming cool is not actually an event or a milestone to achieve, it’s actually a process, a kind of process that is never gonna end.
Being Cool is Related to Being Aware
Ever put your hand in the fire? What happens? The second your senses feel a tad too hot, their danger bells start ringing up in full swing and the signals reach your brain to tell you to put your goddamn hand out of the fire. You’d never intentionally or purposefully be ok with burning yourself now, would you? (well, unless you are a psychopath).
Similarly, when it comes to the mind, you will never be ok with consciously putting yourself in harm’s way. But the problem is that we are simply not aware enough to know what’s actually causing the burn right now. The second you become self-aware about it, you will have to become cool about it. There won’t be a choice if you wanna be cool or not, just like there isn’t a choice of whether you wanna remove your hand from the blazing fire or not.
You’d simply stop letting a certain kind of thought drill a hole in your brain when you can clearly see the consequences of what that particular thought is capable to do. It’s that simple. Just become aware and watch yourself donning that cool self. And when you do, you’d cease to willfully screw yourself over. Because after all, you are the master of your mind, not the other way around.
The World is the Way it is
Life is a colossal battleground that you can’t possibly escape. Earlier on, there were some good guys and bad guys, good situations and bad situations, good moments and bad moments, and it is gonna remain this way in the future as well.
So, the best way to be cool in life is to see reality as it is and tell the truth to yourself. If a lion is brutally tearing down a deer and devouring it, then instead of taking either side, simply accept the reality and say “Well, this is how the world is, so be it! I am gonna be cool about it.” or something. There is no right or wrong here, those are just labels that we put ourselves based upon our own limited understanding.
In life, you are gonna come across a lot of lions doing the hunting and a lot of deers being hunted down, and that’s alright, be cool about it.
You are gonna shit the bed a thousand times and make the bed perfect a million times, be cool about it.
You are gonna sweep her off of her feet and you are gonna make a complete fool of yourself, be cool about it.
You are gonna get favored and you are gonna get betrayed, be cool about it.
You are gonna get success and you are gonna get bulldozed from time to time, be cool about it.
You are gonna lose people close to you and you are gonna get close to people, be cool about it.
You are gonna breathe a trillion times and you are gonna stop breathing after some time, be cool about it.
That’s simply how the world was and is gonna remain the same in the future as well, and when you see it as a fact, you instantly become cool about it. The more interesting thing about this analogy is that I have asked you to be cool about both the seemingly good and bad things which is the necessary part.
If you care too much about the good, you will have to care about the bad too. They are two sides of the same coin, you either get both or none. Now having said that, I don’t imply that you become indifferent or stop having any emotions whatsoever, after all that’s what makes us humans. All I am trying to say is that they both are part of our lives, so just accept them and move on, instead of wallowing in either one of them.
Something good happened? Awesome, relish it and move on.
Something bad happened? Brilliant, learn from it, and move on.
Don’t Take Yourself Too Seriously
So often in life, we feel this urge, this burning sensation to prove the other person wrong, to prove society wrong, to stick it to everyone’s face whenever we hit a jackpot. And that’s precisely the kind of habit that’s disturbing the whole flow of life.
You are just putting yourself in a very tricky situation. On one hand, it can backfire pretty quickly and you would regret you opened your mouth and on the other hand you might have this inner repentance of not being able to brag about your stupendous achievement if you did keep your mouth shut. I say, come out of this petty mentality altogether and be cool about it.
Who cares about whether you are right or wrong? And who even cares about what society thinks about you? Everything is right and everything is wrong, be cool in life.
Stop taking yourself too seriously. Quit holding onto your beliefs so tightly that anyone who isn’t aligned with your line of thinking can’t even be around you without being judged by you. This constant nag of proving something to someone isn’t gonna get you anywhere. BE cool in life and just flow to live a peaceful and calm life.
What is Actually Right For You?
It should be pretty clear to you that whatever your thinking is based on is simply a piece of information. Without any data, you can’t possibly think now, can you?
Furthermore, no piece of information is ever conclusive in this world. A new inflow of data is always coming in, theories are being modified, perceptions are being altered, beliefs are being changed. That’s the limitation of relying on knowledge, it’s never absolute. Even Einstein said, “Knowledge is limited.”
The information that you are perceiving through your senses only is limited. The space looks different when seen from the naked eye as opposed to when seen from a microscope. None of the instruments is complete or perfect in any sense. They all have their own shortcomings which is what makes them beautiful.
And the interesting part is that the minute you see this through, you become absolutely humble and grounded, or of course, cool in life.
I mean, even science supports this analogy. First, they said an atom can’t be broken down any further, then they did break it down to protons, neutrons, and electrons. Now, they again were pretty confident that this is it, only to later find out that it wasn’t. Quarks are apparently smaller than them too.
So, even if such genius scientists can be proven wrong and contradict themselves time and time again, what are you doing trying to hold onto your petty little incomplete belief? Be cool about it and don’t make a mountain of a mole. It’s not worth the effort.
You will always see just a small fragmented part of something through your senses, and so will everyone else. So, it’s only stupid to spend your precious time and energy fighting for incomplete and incorrect information. You are probably wrong, so am I, and so is everybody else. Relax and cool down.
Friendships are Cool
Now that’s the primary reason why we love our friends. You will never be able to sustain a long-term friendship with someone who’s pretty adamant and arrogant about what he believes in. Also that friends are the only category of people who accept you the way you are, or you won’t be friends in the first place.
The whole world will try to impose certain rules and regulations on you and would expect you to change yourself to fit in this giant inaccurate system. But not your friends.
Your friends are the cool ones who know that both of them are a*sholes and that’s ok. They don’t try to change you or judge you or ridicule you. They have simply acknowledged the fact that two(or more) imperfect humans can be perfect for each other.
Make friends, be cool, Live Life. We all live in an imperfect world, we ourselves are imperfect beings, so let’s make the most of this perfectly imperfect world.
When you are actually cool from the inside, you are somehow bestowed with this ability to transform even the most serious of situations into fun banter making the whole scene light and chill. This is the kind of ability that nobody really asked for, but everyone should be well versed with it.
Just imagine, you are surrounded by a bunch of overly serious people who are super easy to get pissed off and always make the whole environment dark and sullen, but still, you have this superpower to be cool in life and can instantly change the complete dynamics of the situation, at least in your head, then isn’t that amazing?
Now, you don’t necessarily have to portray your facetious or flippant self to the entire world, you can simply be content with just laughing inside your own head. People are pretty serious, so you never know when someone would take offense. Better to tread in the shallow water.
So, go ahead, break some rules, create your own status quo. Life’s too short to be too serious all the time. Have some fun. You are gonna die real soon. Don’t miss out.
Your being cool in life depends on what kind of narrative you tell and follow yourself, and not what the world tells you to follow