self understanding

Self Understanding is the Key to Happiness


How many of you feel that the effect of watching some motivational videos about “Self understanding” or reading any inspirational articles on the internet or going through my blog doesn’t last very long?

Even though you are thoroughly enjoying it while you are going through it, but when it comes to your real life, you get stumped. This has been asked of me several times.

The thing is you don’t have to mug up what I say ‘word’ to ‘word’. It’s not gonna help you in any way. (Except if you wanna stick it to someone else and boost your ego.)

Declutter Your Mind To Understand the Self

This should not be the goal, because then you will get confused. Let’s say you read a book on the same topic that you read an article on, then you will start relating and associating it to what I said or what you heard from someone else about the same issue. This would ultimately tangle you up and create unnecessary ruckus in your brain.

Whatever you read here or anywhere else, your priority shouldn’t be to just stuff things in your brain but instead try to analyze the thought process behind it, how the person tries to find solutions to a problem, how to see the problem with the right sight, instead of just feeding in the words.

In fact, this should be the goal everywhere; if you are watching an interview of some famous personalities, then don’t just focus on what they say but try to analyze the thought progression behind it.

Otherwise, all this will be just another source of entertainment that will make you feel good about yourself but it won’t actually change anything.


Understand The Bigger Picture

Most of the people here either just get temporarily motivated by all this or feel good about themselves, and some try to boost their egos, thinking they read something wonderful and now they can share the ‘unsolicited advice‘ with the whole world.

Most of us get cobbled up in these minuscule things only. The ideal way is to walk along with the thought process step by step, connecting the dots, and seeing things from different perspectives (especially your own).

Then the bigger picture, which is what I intend to share, will start becoming more clear, and then you can also see the problems in your life with the same thought process and simplify it effortlessly because now you are using the tool of ‘Self Understanding’, which is probably the best there is to tackle anything and everything in LIFE.

self understanding is the way to go

Break It Down to Understand Yourself

The best quality to do something big is to keep it simple. No matter how enormous the problem looks, you gotta break it down into simpler sets in order to overcome it. 

Which, if you have been paying attention is how our bodies also work, they break down complex substances into simple sugars for easy and hassle-free digestion.

Whenever you get overwhelmed by a problem, simply write it down on a piece of paper. The problem, your supposed action plan, the pros and cons of it, everything. But how many of us do that? Most of us get wrapped up in our brains only, ultimately succumbing in front of the devil.

We don’t stay with a problem long enough. We just want an instant solution. Instant gratification. Needless to say, that’s not the proper way to look at the problem.

The more patience you have for a problem, the healthier your understanding of the solution, and the more effective your actions are.

This is what the right ‘self-understanding’ actually is!

We tend to get agitated if we face a problem and we want to get rid of it ASAP. We become tense and start reacting in an unusual way. If you wanna really get rid of it, then you have to stay with it. This is the real essence of meditation.


Is your Life Becoming Better?

And how will you know whether your understanding is getting better than before? Simple, the more effortless your life becomes, the more stress-free you feel, the better your ‘self-understanding’ actually is.

But on the other hand, if you are putting tons of effort to handle a situation, you are filled with negative thoughts, and taking a shit load of unnecessary stress, then that means there is plenty of room for you to improve yourself.

So, to put it simply, you basically just gotta observe your life peacefully. Try to stay as long as you can with the problems and not because you just wanna get it done with.

A scientist never observes a problem with patience just to get the answer out of it, because then there won’t be any discovery. Only what was previously stored in his memories would come out of it.

self understanding is a process you gotta follow

If you think that just thinking about the problem will get the answer for you, then you will only get what you previously discovered. You won’t find anything new this way.

Even Albert Einstein also said,” You can’t solve a problem with the same level of understanding that created it.” So, what does it mean?

This means that we need to develop a new level of understanding. And how to do that? Like I said before, patiently observing the problem and staying with it, not just for the heck of it but to actually discover something new.


Self-Understanding is the Answer

Why do I keep nagging that ‘self-understanding’ is crucial and blah blah blah every now and then? Well, to put it in a nutshell, because this is the permanent solution to every problem known to mankind. Period.

If you could just fathom what you actually are, from deep within, then the satisfaction you will get from there will be INFINITE.

You will be able to express whatever you want to and no power in this world will be able to stop you. And self-understanding demands a lot of patience and calm along with some excitement and enthusiasm.

self understanding makes you happy

What do you think about my tagline anyway? (‘Believe it or not, you are Infinite’)

I know most of you won’t be able to digest this but still, I wanted to put it out there because there is no greater truth than this that deep within you really are INFINITE. We all are.

Of course in the transactional/surface world we might all be struggling and suffering for all kinds of things, and that’s all right. I just wanted to at least sow this seed deep within your subconscious mind to let it grow.

And this is not some metaphor or pun, it’s the ultimate truth of life. To make you all actually experience it is what I strive for. This is probably the best takeaway you can get from here.

I know most of us won’t accept this, and 99% of those who will accept it will take it in the wrong way. But even if that 1% can understand what I am talking about, then that would be really awesome.

Whatever you see around yourself, it is not different from you, it’s all a part of you. Everything in this world is happening for you. Rain, clouds, sky, rainbow, the flora and fauna, everything!


It’s all Happening in You, for You, and by You

If we can start understanding things in this particular manner, and then observe the world, then we will see a whole different picture around us. You will start seeing things that everyone else is overlooking.

If you can see it this way, then there is no way to experience sadness. If we are all connected deep within with each other, then there’s no way to feel gloominess or loneliness.

When your understanding about who you are becomes absolutely clear, as clear as the font of this page, then nothing is left for you to do to harness happiness. You become ‘happiness’. You become ‘love’.

self understanding will keep you happy and peaceful

After this, you won’t be affected whether you doing something or not. If you are doing something then you can do it with your full potential without worrying about success and failure. If you are not doing anything, then you can sit for hours and observe what’s going on deep inside you.

It won’t matter if you are crying or laughing at the outside, from the inside you will always be at peace.


You have no Idea About The Real You

I have faith that today this thought will get implanted in at least some of you guys, who later on, may or may not ask the pertinent question, “WHO AM I?”

And once the answer to this conundrum starts becoming clear, then you will be completely independent of everything, or in my favorite words; you will be _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _. 

If one hypothetically squeezes the universe, then what will come out of it is the real you. And once you realize this, then the misconception that you have fed on for all your life that “I am this body” will straighten out itself.

It will become crystal to you that your body is like an instrument to express yourself with. If you keep misinterpreting your body with your true self, then all your life, you will just keep on comparing yourselves with others and live a shallow life by accumulating materials around you.

After you deeply understand that everything is already yours and everything is inside you only, only then you can really discover the real potential of your instrument and explore all the possibilities of it.

Whatever the instrument can do, the highest possibility of this body, you shall be able to do it all. You can do it all, you will do it all. Now that we have established the fact that self-understanding is the ultimate key to happiness, how can we develop this understanding?

Many of you must be wondering that people only spend time understanding external things like their jobs, their relationships; so how can one deepen his self-understanding?


Understanding of the Self should be the Priority

Self-understanding is understanding your body, your mind (feelings & emotion), and all the way up to your soul.

To believe that your feelings and your emotions are in someone else’s control, then you will be completely helpless, as you have made yourself a prisoner now.

If you believe this, then all you can do is a futile attempt to change the person next to you. The more you try to change someone, the more you will piss him off, because no one wants to know that they are wrong.

self understanding is no rocket science

Most people who do learn from their own life experiences, learn it just for the heck of it, at a very superficial level. They don’t go to the root cause of it by giving it some ample amount of time.

Firstly, most of us don’t learn from our mistakes only, and out of those who do, the majority of them learn in the manner I just told.

The day you truly start applying the lessons you learned from your past experiences (both good and bad), that’s when you actually start growing, for real. If you could just understand this, then this itself is called a deeper understanding of the self.


Understanding the Obvious

Now if you can’t even understand and take care of your health, then what is all this talk for? People who can’t even understand their skills to be financially independent, then you can’t really expect them to comprehend the deeper meaning of lives.

Those who feel lonely from the inside, first gotta strengthen their relationships in order to get to the next level of self-understanding.

If you actually want a better life, then these 3 are the most important pillars on top of which something even more beautiful and stunning can be constructed.

How do you balance all 3? Again, ‘understanding’. I really can’t emphasize it enough guys. Make mistakes, don’t be afraid of them. Just learn from them and stop criticizing yourselves by setting some monumental expectations, again and again.

Everyone makes mistakes. In fact, if you don’t make enough of them, you will act in a very conservative space, which may instead of pushing you forwards, throw you backward in life.

This learning attitude, coupled with a great vision can take you to places you can’t even imagine in your wildest dreams.

self understanding requires patience

As long as you can’t balance those 3 pillars I talked about, everything else is rubbish. I can’t teach you that, neither can any book; you gotta act on your own, see what’s working and what’s not. Try new things, double down on what’s working and cut what’s not, in every sphere of life. As simple as that.


The Contradictions In Life

One of the signs that your understanding is improving is noticing the contradictions in life. People with a mechanical way of thinking have a very straight-lined approach and they can’t notice things like this.

Let me tell you the contradiction that I observed; people want to know how they can remember what they studied for a longer period of time and at the same time they also want to forget that tragic incident that happened in their lives, which evidently, they can’t erase off their memories.

So, what do they actually want? An improved memory or a weak one? Now, that’s a contradiction. I will tell you what they want, they want to remember all the so-called good things that happened to them, and forget the bad ones. Which is completely BS.

How can you not remember that ugly break-up you had with the supposed love of your life if you can’t forget your first date or how you two first kissed at your mom’s place and any of those 112 memorable things. I mean it doesn’t make sense, right? Even the memory would go cray.

This is one of the signs of intelligence when you can see such contradictions in life.

Now you can know that you are on the right track. On one side, people want success, but they don’t wanna endure the pain and the hassle through which they will achieve it. HOW CONTRADICTORY is that?

self understanding will help you see the ironies of life



Naturally, do we tend to remember things or forget most of them? How many of you remember that mitochondria is known as the powerhouse of the cell?

So, this power to forget, is it a good one or a bad one? It is neither good nor bad; this is the real understanding. Let’s say you have both, some very good hearty memories with a person, and some equally disturbing ones at the same time.

Now, what most of us expect is to remember the good ones and wipe the bad ones out completely. SO, what is the problem here? Flashing of both the good and the bad memories on your brain involuntarily, or your silly desire to just keep the good ones and delete the bad ones?

The LATTER of course. Our brain can’t distinguish between the good and the bad; it doesn’t work that way. This expectation of ours is actually ludicrous. And the cherry on top is that we then blame ourselves for not being able to erase that “bad” memory.


You can’t have a Rainbow without Thunder

This is how you solve a problem when you understand what is it that you are collectively doing wrong. The moment you know it, you can stop doing it, and the problem will cease to exist.

 The moment you stop expecting that you will have only the positive thoughts alone, then the negative thoughts become completely meaningless.

Even a blockbuster film needs a kickass villain to make it worth watching, and so does life. What is so hard about this to understand? Can you really watch Avengers without a Thanos? Of course not. Where’s the fun in that.

If you are in a relationship with someone, then you want the good qualities of the person to keep on increasing and the bad qualities to go out of existence.

But since we never understood ourselves in the first place, we are not used to seeing things this way. So ultimately it all comes back to self-understanding.


To put it all in One Word: IMPRACTICALITY

We live in an impractical manner.

Spirituality is about being absolutely practical. Being absolutely practical means seeing this world as it is and knowing when to put in some effort, and when to do absolutely nothing.

Being practical also implies knowing that every person in this world is exactly the same and not similar if looked at from the ‘substance’ point of view.

But we are stuck at the ‘appearance’ point of view only where there is no way of escaping your problems. Once you realize that you are the very source of everything, not just theoretically but experientially, then you will see wonders all around.


Body Hunger VS Mind Hunger

Once the question of how to satisfy your mind hunger stays with you, you take the next step to a deeper level of understanding.

Because the job you do, or the business you manage, will alleviate only your bodily needs of food, home, and other basic necessities.

We should not be confused between these two terms. One is body hunger; the other is mind hunger which has got no business with food. What fulfills the mind hunger may not necessarily fulfill body hunger. Happiness won’t fill up your paunch.

To fulfill your body hunger, you need food, which will ultimately come from money, for which you gotta work. Whatever action you do, most of the time it fails to satiate your mind hunger. It may show some results for a day or two, but the feeling doesn’t last very long.

The dream, you were chasing so madly before, after achieving it, becomes musty or ordinary after some time. This time frame can vary for different people, depending on their dreams. But the thing to be noted here is that it doesn’t last forever and you go back to square one.

self understanding will fill your inner void

The real question here is how to satisfy the mind’s hunger. Not just temporarily, but eternally. We all know what to do to earn money. Here I am talking about a level deeper.

How to live a happy life?

If we can genuinely stay with this question, then we will automatically get the answer from there. Otherwise, even if I tell you the answer, then you will forget it the moment you get a promotion or after some other so-called big event in your life.

So, it is very important for you to find out the answer to this by yourself.

If you want deep satisfaction in this game of life, living each and every moment to its fullest, whether you are doing anything or not, whether you are getting what you want or not, and to be immensely happy from within; you gotta do what I told you to.



It is pretty easy for other animals. For them, fulfilling their body hunger is happiness. Not for us. We already are overstuffed, still, happiness is scarce.

I am not asking you to stop working or leave your job or change your business or change your partner. That is all necessary at the surface level, for survival. So, don’t mess with this.

Now once we take our understanding to the next level, we can clearly see that a more luxurious life doesn’t essentially mean a more satisfied or happy life. Then we can seriously start discovering real happiness by coming out of this illusory bubble that the whole world is entombed in.

Now there are two ways to achieve happiness.

First Way

One is designing our life which is actually quite similar to building a sandcastle at a beach.

All it takes is a teensy tiny wave, and there goes your sand-cum-water castle, obliterated into a billion particles. This is what most of us do, they take action, become temporarily happy, and then comes a wave, and all our hard work and time went down in the gutter.

self understanding will make you regret free

The Second Way

I am not saying it is a waste but it becomes imperative for us to understand the right way to be happy, which is understanding what you truly are from deep within.

That is the only permanent way of being happy. As long as our definition of happiness stays associated with outer materialistic achievements, success, name, fame, etc; we won’t find everlasting peace.

If you understand what you are, then that is the permanent answer to anything and everything. The best part is, to understand what you are, you don’t have to leave everything and go to the HIMALAYAS.

Just unwearyingly and serenely asking yourself, “WHO AM I?”

This can fill that emptiness in you permanently, which you keep trying to fill all your life by engulfing temporary materials (money, name, fame) which itself comes with a huge void.

The moment you understand your true relationship with the universe then comes the enchanted part. You will come to this realization that you are not separate from this; you are not even a part of it, YOU ARE THIS ITSELF.



“There are no waves or bubbles in this INFINITE ocean, just water. And We Are This WATER!”



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